Lame Man Let Down
for D.B.A.

i.
Wilshire

told you I was giving
In A China Shop and Other Poems
in exchange for $100

never said, never thought
I was trading our friendship for money
for any amount

have I, without at all intending to
traded for $100
what was for me priceless friendship
and now not speaking, now enemies

I want my friend back
entirely willing, entirely prepared

to give back $100 given
to get back a friend I had once

a friend I loved once
a friend I thought loved me

is money the enemy
the root of all evil after all

ii.
turn to her for everything
and I get nothing or next to nothing
more than half the time

iii.
mind and intellect
seeking an encounter
mind wishing- wishes
to meet mind

to affirm and to expand
the rubber band of creation
of the family of man
of the family of minds

family of mine is a family
of intellects, of intellectuals

who love to play table tennis
with their shoes off

iv.
unpleasant
in loving her
being intimate

boyfriend to rub up against

possibly he has me
to brush up against as well

we pass through her
we meet in her

unhappy with who she brings me
into contact with
in touch with

v.
you can ruin me, I can ruin you
fuck too old and too young
let us nonetheless be one

are we in it for poetry's sake
can we shift it a bit
let this be the case

don't delight in being made a fool of
like Malvolio in Twelfth Night

I am the poet for God's sake
the playwright, not one of his characters

in it for poetry, do it for poetry
to and through poetry

promise not to fuck you
without my cock in a poem
not to come inside you, outside of verse

brutal, vicious
to get through to you
after revenge, am I

in response to not being loved
after all my commitment, gestures

after all my heart beats
like hoofs beating,
galloping through the woods
to get to your log cabin


© Obediah Michael Smith, 2010
Written between 4:00 p.m.
Monday, April 19 and Sunday,
12:51 a.m., April, 25.04.10