Crushed Ice
for M.L.R.

i.
could we have
walking together back
joined like that

our steps, our hands
your right, my left

ink left to muddy pages with
paper to talk to, to talk with

we used to converse as best we could
as best we could was good enough
was all the world

we used to be boy and girl
were planning to be man and wife
maybe all too fast

two hearts, together beating,
have come apart

how it was that we were joined as we were
while we were, was like a fairy tale

how it commenced and that it did
and that it sustained, a mystery

a gift from somewhere lofty
from up above, from on high

why has heaven revoked us
taken back what was granted

what did I- did you or did we do
to forfeit such a treat

what harsh word or words
to cause us to come crashing back
into this harsh world

what patience lacking
to cause us to be pulled apart

when we were like ice skating partners
connected, helping, lifting
as we twirled, turned

our partnership is what I miss

that I could allow you
or that you could allow me
to come crashing down to ice

is so without mercy, without care
is so very cold
after having been so enormously warm

hot hot hot worried me a little
I was concerned about burning out
all too readily, all too soon

it was walking hand-in-hand
kisses in public that was best
that thrilled me most

not under-done or over-done
under-cooked or over-cooked

that tenderness was best
it is the tenderness I miss
and want back, that bliss
that connection, that connected

that though is but one side of you
one side of me as well, I imagine

there is as well
the woman of self-defense
woman trained in martial arts

the adversarial side
needing an opponent
made me one

needed me it seemed
in opposition
instead of on her side

I thought God was on our side
thought he had ordained
that we be joined

ii.
how could it have been just a fling
a thing to use
and then to fling away
at the end of the day

iii.
we might have allowed
too many people into-
to enter what was ours
what was too new for all the world

their trampling feet,
their peeping eyes, their curiosity

our affair, too soon mixed
with the affairs of this world

delicate as it was
like a litter of kittens
lacking fur, eyes not open

needing to be licked,
needing to be shrouded,
veiled from the eyes of all the world

we should not have announced
to all the world, what our plans were

what it was that we had discovered:
gold and frankincense and myrrh

we should not have told Herod
where the young child was

wrapped in swaddling cloth
lying in a manger


© Obediah Michael Smith, 2012
Written between 1:15 p.m.
on Thursday, January 19
and 2:55 a.m. on Friday,
January 20, 2012