What Love Demands
for T.L.C.
too big to fit you, to fill you
kill you with joy, with pain
clouds would burst open
rain would pour down
isn't it
about time to drown in love
sweet and cruel as we’ve been
isn’t it time understanding came
ease the pain we’ve caused
because we can
would peace not be good
after all these words
these birds shot down
with slings, with arrows, with wit
is this what it means to be with,
to be for someone
must we use whips
© Obediah Michael Smith, 2008
8:04 a.m. 01.01.08
for T.L.C.
too big to fit you, to fill you
kill you with joy, with pain
clouds would burst open
rain would pour down
isn't it
about time to drown in love
sweet and cruel as we’ve been
isn’t it time understanding came
ease the pain we’ve caused
because we can
would peace not be good
after all these words
these birds shot down
with slings, with arrows, with wit
is this what it means to be with,
to be for someone
must we use whips
© Obediah Michael Smith, 2008
8:04 a.m. 01.01.08
posted by Obie Quiet at 8:16 AM
2 Comments:
not a bad poem, i like the imagery.
"to drowned in love" I take it there was a mistake here. the opening line doesn't connect to the rest of the poem, at least not for me "too big to fit you.." i get the sense of something sexual here but the rest of the poem doesn't coincide with that.
Thanks for pointing out mistake, in need of correcting; added "ed" where the infinitive was required.
Right about the first line being about "something sexual" but is intercourse not occurring in the entire first stanza to the point of orgasm?
too big to fit you, to fill you
kill you with joy, with pain
clouds would burst open
rain would pour down
You've inspired me to leave what is like a vaginal passage between lines 1 and 2. Does this enhance meaning or improve the poem any?
There are several other sexual referenced throughout though:
1. time/to drown in love
2. isn’t it time understanding came
3. would peace not be good
The poem's concluding line, one might conclude, implies S & M:
4. must we use whips
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