Saturday, June 26, 2010

As I Am
for D.B.A.

i.
something about love
and just as I come
and just as I am

want to love her just as she is
fat, young, brilliant

poet
student of science
of literature, of art
of us, of mine

need her to love me just as I am
love has met- has found us
just as we are

do, Love, accept us just as we are

soda drinking, pork eating
wig wearing girl of mine

not all mine
though I've a heart
big enough
to put her in

room enough,
roam enough
alone

time to room
and to roam
together

ii
I'm giving up
running behind you
chasing you romantically

while you ran away
while you chased
tried to own, to pin down
romance of your own

I after you, you after who
obviously not after me

happiness I seek
seeking happiness
just as aggressively elsewhere

exhausted with doing this

juggling boyfriends
switching this one for that one
while I watched
while I waited

as if I had no such feelings
no such interest

like a statue in a square
unable to feel
because not alive

as if there was
no blood in my veins
and I could feel no pain


© Obediah Michael Smith, 2010
Pt. 1 written June 20, 2010,
concluded at 10:17 a.m.
Pt. 2 written June 25, 2010,
concluded at 1:24 p.m.

3 Comments:

Anonymous D.A. said...

The mood of this poem definetly shifted 'ouch' ...the beginning makes me happy but as I progress that happiness mitigates- all in all it is a true reflection of the situation and as T.S. Eliot put it "Humankind cannot bear very much reality."

Saturday, July 03, 2010 9:30:00 AM  
Blogger Obie Quiet said...

The human who wrote it or the human of whom it is written, my darling?

Sunday, July 04, 2010 12:40:00 PM  
Blogger Obie Quiet said...

I neglected to explain, DBA, that pt. 1 and pt. 2 were written way apart which is not this poet's usual process. Pt. 1 was written to capture the state the poet was in on Sunday, June 20. It was written on the way home, in the same cab which took you to LPIA. Pt. 2 was written 5 days later in a very different frame of mind though there is a worry in pt. 1 and 2 which ties them together. Pt. 2 though involves a resolve which was not at all in mind 5 days earlier.

Sunday, July 04, 2010 12:55:00 PM  

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