21
for Leshenna Moss

i.
see you again
see you so seldom
always heaven when I do

angry around the edges
unaware that you are

angry face you'd wear
mask you wear

once we were together
here in this cafe

remember our pledge that day
to be together on your birthday

rainy-Saturday-past
you at work, I at a poetry reading
we apart
our promise never kept

had to seek you out today
gift to surprise you with
you on your new job,
laboring away again

into the kitchen, out front again
orders to place, orders to serve

cooler to stock, beverages in bottles
to cool, these to count and to record

required to take stock
I awaited- awaiting my moment
to break in, to be with you

for a word or two, for a while or less
eager to connect and when I did,
divine

it always is when we make contact
or it usually is

cross with you usually
giving way to what delicious words

ii.
hug her 'til she holler, "Ow!"
cause her to cry out, to cry, "Ow!"

hold her close to me, hard and long
until she scream out, scream, "Ow!"

hug, a pleasure- hug of pleasure
hug her as well to punish her

for the times we should have
been together and instead were apart

squeeze her for the times
I've been unable to reach her
when I expected to hear from her and didn't

squeeze her for all the e-mailed messages
sent to her that have not or have not yet
been answered

she with her cell phone
in her tight jeans pocket
or in her work pants pocket or in her fist

envy the persons who have her phone number
able to call her up, able to locate her
when I cannot

feel excluded also
when her earplugs are plugged in
when her iPod is running
when her music's turned on

when she shuts the world out
to listen to her music

I'm shut out too, shut up, shut off
when she snaps out, snaps into
the groove she gets into
when her iPod's running
when her earplugs are plugged in

at times, she and I are plugged in
have been plugged in to each other

how heavenly it is then
how heavenly it can be

long always for times like those
for times like these

had to squeeze her while I was able to
squeeze in- squeeze out
what is impossible to squeeze out, "Ow"

I'd like to make her holler
for so many reasons, in so many ways

I'd like our physical close-closeness
to be so very long sustaining
instead of fleeting

instead of hello and goodbye
with nothing in between
our being brought together
and our being pulled apart

she with her niece, at home
her sister's daughter, to get to, to watch

déménager, word in French for moving
another reason why
she had to be on her way
when I wanted her to stay
to linger here with me
until 7 p.m.
until Starbucks closes


© Obediah Michael Smith, 2011
Written between 4:40 p.m. and 5:39 p.m.
on Monday, September 26, 2011