Saturday, October 16, 2010

Bean Pods for 3 Women
for D.B.A., S.A. & Cynthia Sue Fisher

unfaithful to my almost wife
claims she does not mind sharing me

makes it easier upon her conscience
my having to share her

at times therefore when I am unfaithful
I am without restraint

that smile shared with this other woman
with whom I am having an affair
allowed to go right through me

a moment of mutual melting
like cubes of sugar in hot tea

ah, to connect like that
affirmation of joy, of pleasure
able to produce
able to provide

what a second or two of intercourse
like I've not had in a long time
outside of the affair I am in
usually on line or over the phone

this was in person, eye contact
we connected, acknowledged it
confessed we love each other
confessed love for each other
and equally as much, an equal amount

that is what was so very pleasing
affirmation of the same amount
of something outpouring, being out poured

how like syrup, a lick of it, a drop of it
to sweeten times gone by- times to come
what can be bitter made better

membrane which separates
Maya and me, Maya from me

she on its other side, breathing air
breathing still, I in my world
where poems are made
making them still

as close to connecting,
to reconnecting- to reconnected
as numbers on my debit card
as information I could buy

her phone number, her e-mail account
her mailing address

membrane between her family
my family for a minute

have they lived all this time
with me left out, locked out

with me outside in whatever weather
have they cared if I lived or died
if I was living or dying

kept alive by tenacity,
other family members
accumulated over time

ages since we were together
since we were last together, since '77,

'78 concluded our correspondence
advised me
not to, any longer, try to find her
she was fine, she said

my seeking her, she said
was upsetting
to her mother

48 then, 80 now
what I've endured these 32 years

what has she gone through
been through, I wonder

girl if you smell me now, you'd leave me
my pajamas is way overdue for washing

silly, lazy me, wearing it still
I'd intended to wash it
day-before-yesterday and didn't
how unpleasant it smells

were you to hug me, hold me now
how repulsed I am certain you'd be

in my room the other afternoon
sitting in my metal, folding chair
watching part 3 of Calle 54
how did my room smell
of what did it smell

was it unpleasant
hint of smelly shoes, of unwashed socks

smell of plastic bag of garbage
hanging upon the knob
of my bathroom door, swinging open

I opened my bedroom's
two push up windows, to let fresh air in
did it make a difference, any at all

want to be for you, the best I can be
in every possible way

will you- can you love me as I am
want to love you as you are
embrace you as you are, hug you, kiss you

want you to be mine, want to be yours
any hope, any chance

so fat, stuffed in your outfits
dough with yeast
stretching, rising

as the sun rises- as the moon rises
as time passes- as earth spins

a fatter and a fatter girl
to put up with

kiss my teeth
not to have seen your pussy slim
not to be able to watch, to witness
your pussy grow- go out of shape
or grow more and more wonderful

want to see you, not clothes
or not just or not only clothes

want to see you as you are
as you see you, and more besides

bare back and thighs
bare hips and sides
Suzie hairy, head of hair

want to know you
not just the shoes, the clothes
you choose to wear

you resist this wish
this desire of mine, burning in me
with equal tenacity to the contrary

thought we were on one team
one side, in making art
in contributing to it, in sacrifices

I do not like writing in the dark
this handicap, this guessing game

lay eyes, lay hands
upon your pussy bare

with eyes, hands
able to touch you anywhere
without all the alarm
elicited when I, at present,
make the most innocent advance

suppose you have in mind
keep in mind

wish expressed
to ejaculate/to come in your hip

come in an opening/a passage
designed for going

come you'd have to fart or shit
to free yourself of

put off ejaculating into your being
where a new being would
commence singing, commence song
heart beating in a bean, germinating

bean vine eventually, full of leaves,
and beans in pods for Shelly

© Obediah Michael Smith, 2010
Written between 10:55 p.m., Friday, Oct. 15 and
4:42 p.m., Saturday, Oct.16, 2010


Anonymous d.a. said...

The title and the ending are nicely tied and absolutely skillful.

As for the rest I am at a lost for words...

Monday, October 18, 2010 8:53:00 AM  
Blogger Obie Quiet said...

Of you, I'd dare say anything, wouldn't I? Does it frighten you? Does it leave you or render you timid, my being so bold? It is usually your role- your choice to intimidate. Are you made, by such language, by such poems, to back down, when the shoe is usually upon the other foot, my darling?

Monday, October 18, 2010 10:59:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Nice peom.

Wednesday, October 27, 2010 9:34:00 AM  

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