Turtle Fills a Hole with Eggs
for T.L.A.

thank you for being with me
in my world

you in my life
and I do not have to be
entirely without Costa Rica
I do not have to be
entirely outside of it

with you in my life,
I can be inside of Costa Rica
and it can be, through you,
inside of me also
and at the very heart of me
where I have located you
allowed you
where you
are situated within me

where you have, with consent
taken up residence

why I am so depressed, so low
I do not know

it might have to do
with all the things
I have to face and to do
after 6 weeks away

it might have to do with
the quality of life in this place

such appallingly low standards
for a place as lovely
as everybody says it is

with a population so small
just over 300,000 and chaos
mayhem

so many among us
so very poorly educated

systems here
not working as they should
breaking down or broken down
not as effective as they aught to be

tourism sector, banking sector
as efficient as can be
well organized, well run
among the best in the world

local life though,
of the lowest standards
intimidated by this place, shy of it

I use to have more room
I used to fear less
but my territory, more and more
has shrunk

there are elections around the bend
fever of elections heating up
some online communication
going on

without end, ending up in my in-box
it depresses me, annoys me
I delete them all without opening one

these politicians, I have concluded
are part of the problem
only pretend that they are
out to find solutions

maybe the solutions
to what involves tourism and banking
maybe what involves
their immediate family and their friends

but I do not see the good life
coming to or getting to Kemp Road,
where I live, anytime soon

how I miss that hotel
where I stayed, in San Jose

those long showers I used to take
each day

since returning home on Sunday,
fifth day of June,
I have washed myself all over
once or twice

I wash my face, brush my teeth
call it a day
that way day after day
and will go on week after week

miss as well the 3 meals a day
I'd eat in Costa Rica
lunch in the cafeteria
at Universidad de Costa Rica

it is by far a nicer place than here
less than forty cents to catch the bus

here you pay $1.25
and what an atmosphere, what a culture

you board a bus not knowing
what you will be greeted with

why is it not constant, consistent,
pleasant on any bus you board

you go for as many jitney rides
as buses you catch
I dread having to take them

I'd pray that one will come
that I can live with

why is the government powerless
to say a word or lift a finger
against so many negative people
against so much
negative behavior

what agreements,
they leave me wondering,
have me wondering,
have they made or do they make
to get elected

are the people promised
that they will be free
to govern themselves
if who ask them for their support
gets elected

a waste of time complaining
about or trying to change
what has been sanctioned
by the highest offices in the land

why therefore should I lift a finger
or raise a hand

want to pick myself up
and be off,
back to Hotel Aranjuez

so what if earthquakes shake it
now and then

music booming in vehicles pulling up
or going by or the endless roar
of endless motor bikes on my street
and the earth quakes
and hardly ever stops

upheaval that is not at all good
for mind, body or soul

Tat in my life but she's far away
in Limón

I have pictures, her messages
but are these enough
strong enough medicine
against how sick I feel
in my heart and soul tonight


© Obediah Michael Smith, 2011
5:30 a.m. 21.06.11