A Sudden & Violent Change
for Sonia Farmer & Jonathan Murray

i
must have come away from her for something
could not have come away from her for nothing

to Hub away, to the Hub, away from home
to have go through my blood
what oxygenates or what deoxygenates it

I am pulled between loves
in love and in love, at war with each other

who will speak first
will you speak all at once
or will I have to listen to a choir of silence

art with not a word to say
artists without a word for me

tell me a secret, sing me a song
and the jewel dance, the light in it

the breeze from the fan in the ceiling
dress with its nude, like clothing on a line
like when breeze blows

nude body outside the dress
rather than inside, rather than within it

pussy with its pubic hairs
with its bushy patch
know no razor blades

ii.
keep still art, I want to take a snapshot
difficult to leap upon a horse already galloping

on the earth, galloping
but it always was, it always has been

to get off is what would create a problem

how many frames per second
to create the illusion of motion
how many still pictures

a gun clicks and a camera clicks
I turn, concerned, for safety sake

what to do - duck or run or hide
or dive for cover

cowboy, in the nick of time
pitches, lands in a pile of hay

to save his skin, his hide
to save the day

iii.
speaks for itself and has already spoken
mother weeping with her son in her arms

is he breathing still, with his head back
with his mouth wide

is he lifeless or just lifeless looking

is he wounded or has his life in his teens
been snatched away

what lead to this day
way to or from the cross

why is the mother alone with her burden
this far away
as well as this long after
she could carry him like a nut in a shell
in the safety of her womb

limbs to strike and kick and kill
arms too short to box with God

in a bout with the devil, unable to win
mother with her loser,
with her loss in her arms
asking heaven, why

weeping, broken hearted
and will not be consoled
certainly not this evening

iv.
just before the trap door goes out
from under foot
the condemned offered blind fold

just before the taut rope
just before the night sweat
the light switch and some,
as tough as nails, wave it away

wanting to die with eyes wide open
wanting the operation without anesthetics

the tooth pulled or to give birth
and feel the push, the pull, the pain

v.
for shame of what she hides her face
or hand to hide her eyes to cry

by what emotion gripped, to react like this
a hand to hide it with, to reveal it with

how bare we are when we think we hide
when we think we're hidden

don't mean to make you weep
are my words weapon

did I draw it,
pull it, when I should not have

with your weeping
you have disarmed me quite
you have disarmed me certainly

would you mind if I joined you
behind your hand

ashamed am I of harm I've caused
of hurt

I want to use words instead to heal
to reach into you
and to embrace

vi.
exquisite flies over Bethlehem
alight upon the dead, decomposing flesh

what must it smell like
when life attracts flies

the dying, the dead, the mother with child

what has gone wrong here
flies and butterflies over the city

whose city is it, whose city will it be
come morning or when evening comes

this mother's baby
she's not too pleased with

will squeeze life from
rather than breast nipples
for tender lips

skip the crib the Gerber baby food
this child for the garbage heap

vii.
crosses like kites, as high in the sky
inconsolable someone, with tears to weep

woman to weep, to wail, to mourn
and what for, with her nails and her high shoes

one foot of shoes, missing
as well as one wing

one thing to say to her to console her
wish I knew that word, had that word

wish I were able to prevent
the world ending when it does
as it does

dust to dust
and so on

viii.
is this a coyote thirsty for blood
at the foot of the cross
where a savior has died

or a place where some poor soul
has been buried
and cannot find rest

ix.
what ruin left to tell the tale
or what architect
designed the temple

are these churches attended
how empty of souls they seem

aquamarine sea in the distance
is a sign of redemption
to get to
or to come
or to come to

x.
sail boat sail
mail boat bail
or we will go under
or over or down

sail boat sail
mail boat bail

boat taking on water
and sharks swim round

xi.
flesh fresh
breasts
birth

all this pain and suffering
life to carry on
and to cry over

struggle of living and dying
life to swim through, rough

must learn how to

xii.
light to lighten the gentiles
to light the genitals

graffiti from a rest room
beneath a light switch, I recall

where was that wall
somewhere I used to frequent

these the poets floating about
like flatulence

I want to introduce you to art
to an artist, to this image

if I could make it out
if I could see it

if yur caan hear you’ll feel
my mother used to say

and which psalm is it
which invites us to
oh taste and see

must be able to switch senses
whichever vehicle required
to get me to the church on time

xiii.
installation of sand and glass instead
to stimulate me

like that one Blue Curry
took to Germany

want to leave the beach
with sand in my toes, in my shoes

or with a cut foot
to hop home on

xiv.
what a wonder wudder happen
if all had not fallen down, fallen in

where I wudder bin ta day
if I hadn't died or was never born

wonder what God tink
bout dis worl he create

what man has made of it

what would dis world have been like
wit out man, with all his toil an troubles

with all his bubbles, from underwater,
rising


© Obediah Michael Smith, 2010
Written between 5:07 and 6:28 p.m.
at the Hub, on Saturday, March 27, 2010,
of 10 visual artists’ contributions
to A Sudden & Violent Change,
Hub contribution to
Transforming Spaces, 2010